It has been more than a month since we left our home. Since then we had all kinds of thoughts, feelings. I don’t remember myself being so moody anytime in my life before. So what are the things we learned on our road? Good’s and bad’s - I will reveal everything. Let’s start with a good one.
Most of the times that feeling can be scary. In reality, that means you’re responsible for your life. But for us, that’s also feeling of happiness. We want to be accountable for ourselves; we want to be masters of our faiths. It’s hard, but it’s worth it.
My solution: I keep repeating myself my tiny mantra: “I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul.” For some, it will sound stupid but for me represents something more profound.
Our synapses are screaming for known patterns. Which is exhausting. Especially at the beginning - when your brains still didn’t develop a travel routine. We expected that. It’s a little harder for us. We wanted to cheat at the beginning. For a start, we wanted to visit a place where we already been and prepare everything. But it didn’t go as planned (you can read more here).
My solution: I am trying to create new patterns based on old ones. For example today I am writing from a coworking place - I used to work in one in Slovenia. And it’s better - my brains connect the area with previous patterns. The next thing is to integrate my workout routine and morning routine. It is a little bit harder because I am not the only one in it. But we will manage.
We miss interacting with people. Mostly because of language barriers (we don’t speak Spanish) but there are other things too. I remember that when we'd spent a year on Gozo first meaningful interactions took time. I guess we’re not giving enough time - we’re not patient enough.
My solution: First thing is connecting with people who have similar interests. Working in coworking places seems like a place to do it. And there are also communities of traveling people - I discovered one today. So the plan is to search for people like us. They are usually in the same position, with similar feelings. So more open-minded for meeting new people.
It seems like kids are getting too big. I know the words - kids are mirrors of ourselves. When we went to Gozo - Lejla was the right age, so she didn’t have any thoughts before interacting. And Erik was following her steps. Today she is shy, and Erik is following her. So they are missing kids with whom they could play. A nursery is almost impossible to get only for a month. Maybe we should stay longer in one place.
My solutions: That one is the hardest. It’s not only about me anymore. We’re thinking about jumping to New Zealand. Or some English speaking country. Kids know how to speak English already. I am sure of one thing - they are watching us, and if they see we are not interacting with others they don’t. Or we must push ourselves out to unknown. We will see.
Leaving everything behind seems a lot easier before we went. After the first month, I started to miss our routine. Not home like a location but a place where everything is like you want. Selfish - some travelers would say it’s not what’s traveling is about. Feeling that we don’t have a place which we would call home is scary. I guess I need to give more time to travel, open my mind. Everything comes with a price to pay, and that was a price of our story.
These are some of the things I wanted to expose. There are more. Small things we’re grateful for, but there is not enough space (or I am too lazy to write them down). What will we do - we shall see. I am sure of something - we are going up - growth is what we seek, and growth takes some effort.
Growth is what we seek, and growth takes some effort.
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Yesterday we hopped on the train and took a trip to Bohinj lake. Our bikes had the pleasure to join us. Kids were super excited — they love to swim, and lakes are the best because the water is calm and sweet. But to get there, you need to sit on a train for two hours.
We decided that we’ll go back to Gozo. We’ll stay there until we recharge ourselves and our valets. In a way, it is liberating that we finally determined where we’ll go next. But on the other hand, I feel disappointed. It is like breaking up with a guy. After some hard and unsatisfied period of your time together, you decide to break up with him, and that makes you feel liberated. But at the same time, you feel down, because you failed to build something lasting, your vision of the future with him no longer exists. Your eyes are glowing with excitement for the new possibilities, but some bitterness stays on your tongue.
Mommy: an interviewer. The interviewee: Lejla and Erik
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